50 Funny Housewarming Messages [for New Home Cards]

Do you want to send some new home best wishes to someone and want to make it fun? If you know someone who has just moved into a new home and they love a good joke, the chances are they’ll appreciate a funny ‘welcome to your new home’ message.

So, if you’re about to write the card, and need inspiration for some funny housewarming wishes, we have just the thing. We’ve gathered over 50 of our favorite funny and amusing new home quotes that will definitely raise a smile and a chuckle.

Happy housewarming messages don’t need to be dull. Scroll through the sections until you find the perfect funny saying for your new home card.

50+ Funny and Amusing Housewarming Wishes to Write in a New Home Card

General Funny Housewarming Messages:

When you want to wish someone good fortune, good health and lots of love in their new abode – but with a side of smirk – here are some fabulous funny housewarming messages to add to your new house card.

  1. Your new house is perfect. So, when can I move in?
  2. Congrats, now you can walk around naked!I hope you remember this moment in your new home forever. Because it will never be this clean or organised ever again.
  3. Good luck convincing your neighbours that you’re normal! I know you’ve been busy moving in, so don’t worry I’ve already briefed them!
  4. Your new home is lovely – which is a good job, as you won’t be able to afford to go out anymore!
  5. Best Wishes On Your New Home. Hopefully the neighbours aren’t weird.
  6. Don’t forget to throw a party for us, we are waiting. Congratulations!
  7. Many congrats on your new home. Please can you send me the wifi password in advance? Thanks!
  8. Congratulations on your new home that’s too far away for me to visit.
  9. A new home is where you can say anything you want because nobody listens to you anyway.
  10. Nothing a lick of paint and 150k can’t fix.

Funny House Warming Quotes for New Neighbours

Do you have new neighbors and want to send them a little welcome to our neighborhood funny message? Probably best to ensure they have a sense of humour before popping these in he happy new home card or you might find things a little awkward in the future.

  1. Congratulations on your new home. Hope your neighbours aren’t idiots.
  2. Good luck convincing your new neighbours you’re normal.
  3. Hope your neighbours aren’t creepy.
  4. Welcome to the neighborhood! Don’t worry, we won’t judge your decorating choices…too harshly.
  5. Welcome to the neighborhood! We promise not to judge your gardening skills, as long as you promise not to judge ours.
  6. I heard you just moved in – I hope you’re not too attached to your furniture because my cat has already claimed your couch as her own.
  7. Home is where you can dance like nobody’s watching because nobody is watching – unless you have nosy neighbours.

Funny Housewarming Quotes for Friends

Got a friend with a new place and want to send them an amusing message to mark the occasion? You can usually be a little more familiar with your friends than family and neighbours, so this is the opportunity to really find something funny and amusing to bring a smile to their face.

  1. May your home always be too small to hold all your friends!
  2. Congratulations on your new home! Now you can finally stop worrying about your deposit and start worrying about your mortgage.
  3. May your new home be filled with laughter, love, and all the pizza delivery menus you could ever need!
  4. May your new home be blessed with good karma, good vibes, and good plumbing.
  5. Congratulations on your new home! May your kitchen always be stocked with wine and cheese, and may your fridge always have room for leftovers.
  6. Congratulations on moving all your stuff from one place to another.
  7. Thanks for not asking me to help you move. Welcome to your new home.
  8. Hope the stress of dealing with useless estate agents was worth the move.
  9. You have a new home to kill all your plants in.

Funny Housewarming Wishes for a Best Friend

When your best friend moves house it’s time to recognise their new surroundings with a funny quip, quote or saying to help them recognise the happy occasion. We have some funny personal messages you can send to your best buddy when they move into their beautiful new home.

  1. Home is where the heart is… and the TV, the snacks, the comfy couch, the cute pet, the messy desk, and the endless supply of wine.
  2. A new home is like a blank canvas, and you’re the artist. But don’t worry, I won’t judge you if you paint everything in neon green.
  3. A clean house is a sign of a wasted life.
  4. Yay! You bought a new home -> place to party!
  5. Your biggest mistake was giving me your new address. I can’t wait to overstay my welcome!
  6. Both of us can’t look good at the same time. It’s me or the house!
  7. You put the ‘ho’ in homeowner.
  8. Congrats on your new home. Don’t burn it down.
  9. Congrats on your new home. I bought you some wine so I have something to drink when I visit.
  10. Congrats. Now you can walk around naked. (Close the blinds though, no-one needs to see that).

Funny Housewarming Messages for Pet Lovers

Your pet loving friends have started a new life in their new nest and you want to send an amusing message to celebrate their new adventures. There’s no better way to celebrate their big move than writing some funny house warming wishes about their beloved furry friends.

  1. I herd you mooved.
  2. Welcome to your new purrfect home.
  3. May your new home be filled with all the pet hair, muddy paw prints, and unconditional love your heart can handle.
  4. Congratulations on your new home! May your animal kingdom grow and thrive.
  5. May your new home be filled with wagging tails, slobbery kisses, and happy purrs.
  6. May your new home be filled with cuddly cats and endless naps – for both you and your furry friends
  7. Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat.
  8. Home is where the dog slobber is just another accessory.

Famous Funny Quotes for a New Home Card

You have your housewarming greeting card and want to send a personal message to wish them a fabulous life in their new home. You want to include a funny famous quote as a way of celebrating their good news. Here are a few of our favorites that hit the mark every time.

  1. “A good friend will help you move. But a true friend will help you move a body.” – Steven J. Daniels
  2. “Moving is like childbirth. You forget how painful it is until it happens again.” – Loni Anderson
  3. “My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.” – Erma Bombeck
  4. “I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.” – Julia Child
  5. “Home is where you can dance like a fool and not be judged… unless you have nosy neighbors.” – Ellen DeGeneres

Funny Housewarming Messages for New Homeowners

It’s their first home. They finally got their own place and moved into their new home. Next you want to send bags of warm wishes for a happy life – but with a dose of fun and joshing. Never fear, you can still spread the joy on their new chapter and put a smile on their faces with our selectino of funny housewarming wishes for a new homeowner.

  1. Congratulations on your new home! Remember, now you’re officially an adult – which means you’re responsible for your own toilet paper supply
  2. May your new home be filled with good times, good friends, and good takeout.
  3. Congratulations on your new home! May your mortgage be the only thing that weighs you down.
  4. You’ve officially joined the homeowner’s club. Just don’t forget to bring your tool kit
  5. Home sweet homeownership!
  6. Congratulations on finally moving out of your parents.
  7. Happy New Apartment. Wishing you good times, quiet neighbours and ample parking.

Now you’ve found a way of saying welcome home with a giggle, do check out our other articles in this series for new homes.

60 Housewarming Wishes to Write in a New Home Card

90 New Home Quotes and Sayings for a Housewarming Card

25 BEST Housewarming Gifts for New Homeowners

280 Best Merry Christmas Quotes for a Holiday Card

150 Funny Christmas Wishes for a Holiday Card

Leaving Home Quotes

Missing Home Quotes

Welcome Home Quotes

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Jen Stanbrook
Jen Stanbrook

Jen is an interiors writer and blogger and has an insatiable love of home style and decor

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